This is how we, men and women, entered the ceremony in our glitzy clothes and opulent jewelry to keep track of who sat with who and who donned what. We played Tombola, bid on a car, necklace or painting and donated money for a noble deed that might save a child’s life or help a family. What is wrong with that?

We raise money from “the rich” and then spend it on “the poor” as verbalized by the receptionist. So what is the big deal about flaunting our benevolence and wanting to engage in further philanthropy, except that they are often propelled by a jealous and ostentatious disposition? What is giving? What is hypocrisy?

The essence of the matter lies in the motive and the meaning. “It is when you give of yourself that you truly give,” says Gibran Khalil Gibran. And the self knows what you did.

• Worthless is all that a fraudulent trader gives.
• Worthless is all that an abusive despotic employer gives.
• Worthless is all that is given by a politician who fails to assume his responsibilities in Parliament or at the Ministries of Public Health, Public Works and Transportation, Energy and Water, Education, etc
• Worthless is all that is bestowed by the opulent of ill-gained fortunes.

“You often say, “I would give, but only to the deserving.” The trees in your orchard say not so, nor the flocks in your pasture,” Gibran adds.

The problem with these pretentious forms of giving is that:

• They are designed to alleviate the ailing conscience of the donor, which he knows, has been weighed down by too much wrongdoing to lay at rest.
• They give off the impression that one is generous and benevolent and thus conceal one’s ill-doings.
• They obscure the violations and underplay the guilt of those who have squandered public money and abused public and private properties as well as those who have fallen short of their responsibilities and contributed to exacerbating education and healthcare costs, unemployment and brain drain, tricking us into believing that this bank or that millionaire are philanthropists.
• They stifle our role and social responsibility as citizens. Instead of pressuring the government to assume its duties by ensuring a proper healthcare coverage, imposing purposeful taxation and improving public education, we become too blindfolded by the alleged generosity to take any action. So-and-so has “given”! Given what? If anything, let him serve diligently in his post.

Speaking of giving, it might be useful to take a glance at some of the world’s most celebrated givers:

• Bill Gates: Donations worth USD 29 billion
• Li Ka Shing: Donations worth USD 10 billion
• Cummings Family: They gave away 90% of their fortune amassed mostly from the real estate industry. How large are the contributions made by the Lebanese business magnates in the real estate and construction sector to their community and how much tax did they pay on their profits? After their death, Bill and Joyce Cummings will donate their entire wealth because their children have enough. By enough, the parents mean the family house, the jewelry and the furniture.
• Warren Buffet: He has pledged to give away his fortune worth USD 58 billion prior to or upon his death provided that the sum is spent to the last penny within 10 years.

The total US donations soared in 2012 to USD 316 billion, most of which was offered by individuals, thanks to a conducive taxation system and a community that appreciates community service.

“There are those who give and know not pain in giving. These are generous. And there are those who give much and withhold little. These are munificent. But to reach the virtue of altruism, one must give it all and put others ahead of themselves.”